Computing Moment: How to remove viruses and malware from your PC for FREE

I am writing this guide for the everyday user.  You don't need any special skills or knowledge, just be able to read instructions and follow them.  I am writing this because it seems like every week, another one of my friends e-mails me regarding some hot deal they just found on the net or a link to free anti-virus software or some other completely out of the blue topic with some sketchy looking link.  

Being tech-savvy, I quickly recognize sketchy emails / msgs as a scam and that clicking on the link would not be smart for my computer. It would most likely infect my system, causing me to send out unsolicited emails or use my email in an attempt to hack my online services (like Facebook, PayPal, E-Bay, YouTube, Web Banking, etc.)


Step 1:  FROM A NON-INFECTED COMPUTER - CHANGE YOUR PASSWORD -   Make sure you don't use the same computer because most likely the virus will see what you are doing and get the new password as well!

Step 2:       Click here -  http://www.malwarebytes.org/  and click the "DOWNLOAD " blue button. It will take to one of several sites hosting the file.

Step 3:      Save the file to your computer, somewhere handy and easy to find.

Step 4:     Now that you have this handy (and FREE) program saved to your computer. Install it.  make sure you uncheck the option to install any toolbars.

Step 5:    Once it is installed - Start it.

Step 6:    You will be prompted with 3 options : Quick, Full, or Flash scan.  Select the "Full Scan" option and then click the "Scan" button.  Let it run.  This will take a while.  I suggest baking some cookies in the meantime.  You probably have close to an hour or so to wait it out and its really not that exciting to watch...
## Don't be alarmed if you have tons of issues found ##


Step 7:  When its done it should present you with a list of problems it found. The Malware Bytes program should have a "Remove Selected" button.  Click it.  Let it delete all the crap it found on your computer.

Step 8:  Restart your computer.

Step 9: Thats it.  Hopefully you noticed the system was faster as well.   Congratulations you Nerd!



Hopefully you found this helpful.  If it didnt fix your problem I apologize, this really does work for 99% of the malware issues out there.  If this made your computer worse, sorry again, but I take no responsibility.  Sometimes systems are too infected to save and you just need to reformat.  Best of luck!

Automotive Moment - Headlight Restoration

Soooo, one of my headlights died. I kind of left it for a bit because I am lazy and enjoy avoiding expenditures on things other than food, alcohol, or entertainment.

Well, ironically, in an effort to procrastinate something totally unrelated, I actually motivated myself to sort this problem out.

I drive a 1999 Acura 3.5RL and after establishing that the headlight that died costs $175.00 just for a new bulb (and headlights are best replaced in pairs wouldnt-you-know), I decided a "Bullion Investigation" (tm) was needed. I immediately went online to see what I could teach myself and find a cheaper way of getting this done. This is how I do things.

As I got carried away on ebay shopping for new bulbs at $40 (1/4 of the store price!), I realized the plastic of my headlights looked OLD. The plastic lens cover was cloudy / foggy and really showed the cars age. I decided that if I am going to go to the lengths of learning how to install new headlights, buying them off the internet, and finally installing them, the headlight fixture better look damn good!

I ended up on an Acura enthusiast forum, Acurazine, a great resource for Acura owners. One of the members suggested a "headlight restoration kit" which should be available at a local parts store for $20 and even though this nice guy was from Wisconsin, he was right.

I drove myself down to the "local parts store" aka PartSource - here in Ontario - and picked up a "Permatex: Plastic Lens Restoration Kit". The sales guy was actually really cool. He didn't treat me like a lost-cause when I stated 'I rarely open the hood without supervision', he kind of admired I was taking an interest in the automotive world. Then he said something scary; he wasn't sure how it would turn out.

He'd only sold two: one guy said it was great, the other guy nearly beat him up because it ruined his headlight altogether. He said to follow the directions STEP BY STEP and SLOWLY, infact he said that to me twice. I rarely follow directions, let alone slowly, so I took special heed of this warning.

See how it unfolds below

Before:

Barf

Before Closeup:

In both Before photos, the headlights had been wash/scrubbed and dried!!

The Kit:

Sales Pitch: The Kit itself was really fucking good. I am a total novice and found the directions VERY easy to follow. It also has everything you need, including nifty plastic gloves, so when you are working on your car in the driveway and lots of people are looking you feel like a car surgeon, not a doofus mechanic.

After 10 min of 1000 grit sanding:

Halfway through, now on the 2000 grit sanding:

After polishing, the fresh new look!

Highly recommend it!

This shit did exactly what I hoped it would. I recommend anyone else with shitty looking headlights to do this, your car will look younger and you will feel like a allstar.

Full Frontal:

Thanks for reading, good luck. Will follow up with another automotive moment when I install the new headlights!

Pets and why the city of London is Retarded

 I found myself looking at pets today that I could keep and found myself once again, looking at pet chickens. not the gross barn yard ones, but the fancy kind.

Polish Chamoise Chicken

I called London Animal control to ask whether or not chickens are allowed...

"Hi, I don't know if you are the right person to ask, but Im calling to find out what pets are legal to own in the city."

"Ok, what type of pet were you inquiring about"

"Fancy breeds of chickens"

"No, sorry, Chickens arent allowed as pets within the city"

"Oh, but parrots are?"

"Yes, they are, as well as budgies and cockatiels, those types of birds"

"Well fancy chickens are pretty like those birds"

"Sorry sir, chickens aren't allowed" -- now I hear laughing in the background

"Ok, so what about peacocks, they are like halfway between chickens and parrots"

"No sorry, peacocks arent allowed"

"Hmm... what about quails"

She covers the phones and asks someone about quails "No sorry sir, Quails are just like chickens, so no."

"They are a lot smaller though, and could be caged easily"

"No sorry sir, even if you cage a chicken (she means quail), it doesnt matter. Only caged birds like Parrots or budgies are allowed"

"So as far as birds are concerned, thats all I can have"

"Yes sir."

"Hmm Do you have a list online I could peruse to see all the types I AM allowed?"

"Uhh, if you go to the city website, and look up health bylaw #4, it should have it"

"Oh Ok, thanks, I'll check it out."

With out further ado, here is a link to the bylaw stuff:

http://www.london.ca/By-laws/PDFs/animals2000.pdf

Now to save you from having to figure it all out, here is what I will call the highlights.

Part 2

CLASSES OF ANIMALS

2.1 Animals - ranked by class

Animals shall be ranked according to the classes set out in this Part of this by-law.

2.2 Class 1 animal

"Class 1 animal" shall mean cow, donkey, goat, horse, mule, pig (swine) of all species including

hybrids, pony and sheep.

2.3 Class 2 animal

"Class 2 animal" shall mean chicken, goose, turkey, duck and any domestic fowl.

2.4 Class 3 animal

"Class 3 animal" shall mean homing, pouter, racing or tumbler pigeons.

2.5 Class 4 animal

"Class 4 animal" shall mean domestic cat, guinea pig, gerbil, hamster, mouse, rat, rabbit,

chinchilla, ferret and turtle.

2.6 Class 5 animal

"Class 5 animal" shall mean non-venomous snakes, non-venomous lizards and non-venomous

spiders.

2.7 Class 6 animal

"Class 6 animal" shall mean domestic cardinals, finches, budgies, bulbuls, canaries, tanagers,

amazons, cockatoos, conures, macaws, parakeets, cockatiels, loorikeets, touracos, toucans,

orioles, mynahs, magpies, barbets, arcaris, pied hornbells and cock-of-the-rocks.

2.8 Class 7 animals

"Class 7 animals" shall mean any animal of a type that is normally found in a wild and natural

state, whether or not it has been bred and/or raised in captivity and includes but is not limited to

bear, wolf, coyote, crocodile, alligator, bobcat, lynx, mountain lion, cougar, tiger, lion, monkey,

fox, skunk, kangaroo, eagle, hawk, elephant, weasel, racoon, venomous lizard, venomous

snake, venomous spider, all birds the keeping of which is prohibited in the Migratory Birds

Convention Act, S.C. 1985, C.M-7, and regulations thereto and all animals the keeping of which

is prohibited in the Fish and Wildlife Conservation Act, 1997 and regulations thereto.

Please note the Bolded animal in section 2.7 "Cock of the Rocks" Here is a picture:

Why is this bird on the ok list!? Its native to Machu Picchu!

Now here are the laws.

Part 4

PROHIBITED MATTERS

4.1 Animals - keeping - more than 2 per dwelling

No person shall keep more than two animals in a dwelling unit or on any premises.

4.2 Class 1 - keeping - within City

No person shall keep a class 1 animal within the municipal boundaries of the City of London.

4.3 Class 2 - keeping - within City

No person shall keep a class 2 animal within the municipal boundaries of the City of London.

4.4 Class 3 - keeping - more than 40 - during winter

No person shall keep more than 40 banded class 3 animals between October of one year and

March of the following year.

4.5 Class 3 - keeping - more than 60 - during summer

No person shall keep more than 60 banded class 3 animals between April and October of any

year.

4.6 Class 3 - keeping - more than 2 - unbanded - any time

No person shall keep more than 2 unbanded class 3 animals at any time.

4.7 Class 3 - flights - unsupervised

No person shall fail to supervise the flight of class 3 animals.

4.8 Class 3 - flights - 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. - summer

No person shall fail to prohibit class 3 animals from flight between 9:00 o'clock a.m. and 5:00

o'clock p.m. during the period from April 1 to September 30.

4.9 Class 3 - flights - 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. - winter

No person shall fail to prohibit class 3 animals from flight between 10:00 o'clock a.m. and 3:00

o'clock p.m. during the period from October 1 to March 31.

4.10 Class 7 - keeping - within City

No person shall keep a class 7 animal within the municipal boundaries of the City of London.

4.11 Animal - running at large

No person shall permit any animal to run at large.

4.12 Trespassing - by animal

No person shall permit any animal to trespass on any property.

4.13 Food - storage - failure to use rodent-proof container

No person shall fail to keep feed or animal food in a rodent-proof container.

4.14 Keeping - animal - not permitted by statute

Notwithstanding any of the provisions of this by-law, no person shall keep any animal, the

keeping of which is not permitted under any statute of Ontario or Canada.

So to recap...
No house can have more than 2 pets. Nearly every person I know in london is in violation of this bylaw, again, ridiculous.

All pet food must be kept in rodent proof containers?

And the most ridiculous  - You can only have 40 pigeons in the winter... but in the summer 60 is ok. BUT you cant let them out between 9-5 in the summer (wth?)